I feel like Amy Winehouse: "They tried to make me go to rehab, I said, 'no, no, no!'"
Not quite, but I am discovering that Recovery was a day at the beach compared to Rehab. Recovery was an inconvenience. Rehab is a serious pain in the foot. For those following at home, you will remember that I ditched one crutch three days ago and am getting around on the other one. It's painful. I have a choice of shooting pain or stabbing pain in the low-outside part of my left foot. It's not at surgery site, but an inch to two below, where the foot is still blue and swollen. It hurts when I lift the foot and when I put it down. Relief comes when the foot is at rest either in the air or on the ground. To maximize relief, I walk V--E--R--Y S--L--O--W--L--Y. That way, the foot stays on the ground and in the air longer and there is more time between the stabs and bolts of pain. It's worse when I have a short walk, such as from the table to the kitchen. Sitting at the table, the foot is at rest and it feels fine. As soon as I stand up, pain starts. I try to figure out a way to avoid or minimize it, then realize that I should suck it up and deal with it, but by then I'm at the kitchen sink, where I stop to rinse the dishes, and while I'm stopped, there's no pain. It takes a few minutes to rinse dishes and put them in the dishwasher. By then, physical and mental pain have abated, but I have to start a new commute back to the table or to the couch, and the ordeal begins anew. Longer walks that last a few blocks are easier. Yes, I have to put up with pain initially, but after half a block I develop a semblance of a rhythm, start breathing Yogically into the foot, and get myself to a mental place where it's fairly manageable. A bit farther, and I seem to relax, also something seems to shake loose in the ankle and it feels better and I am more confident in my walking. Then I arrive where I was going, sit down, it all stiffens again and we start all over. The overall impression, however, is that the pain is as much in my foot as in my brain.
Advil seems to help a lot. I am taking rather massive 800 mg twice a day and 30-45 minutes after I take it I feel a lot better.
Walking is not really walking. The leg feels like a peg leg. I swing it forward, put it down, shift m weight over it, swing the right foot forward and repeat. Because of pain and massive atrophy, my left foot is not functioning. It's just there every other step as a base of support, but I cannot use it to push off, stand on my toes, or, really, use as anything other than a peg. I stood on the foot two days ago and thought of rising up onto my toes and simply could not fathom how to do it. The brain could not imagine how to tell the body to execute the action. I feel like a toddler. Jessica says pilates on her reformer will help with this. I haven't tried it yet, but I'm a believer for now.
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